Life is so unfair.

Is it because of the karma I did in my previous life ??
Is it because of the sins I did??
I just don't understand the reason why..
People say when someone scold you means they love you and beat you means they care for you.
I tried to apply this quote in me coz I used to get beaten up by my mom and now keep get lecture by her..
For my bro,he din get beaten up or get any scoldings..Does this means my mom don't love him??However he is so much happier.This make me feel so freaking jealous and totally unfair for me.Until today,I still don't dare to talk back to my mom.I mean,I won' stand for my own right.This is because I'm still scared.The phobia I get from her is still in me.i do like her but not all the time.Just that I feel really tired of it.She din keep her promise and stuff like that.She said that i do not need to help out at shop once i start my form 6 but end up??I still have to work every saturday night.My elder sis and cousins stop working once they finished SPM but me?Still stuck in this freaking shop.Work like a bull for 8 hours and get only like 20 bucks?
I HATE MY LIFE !!...
When we was young,we started working at the age of 9 ! yes!! standard 4! but my younger bro and sis,they do not need to work.My younger sis already form 2 and she is so freaking seldom go to work.Its rare to see her at shop.My elder sis get mopst of the thing she wated.MOST OF IT! I feel so left out in this family.I feel that I doesn't belong here.I want to commit suicide but I do not have the courage to do so..GOD please help me :( Please OPEN my mom's eyes and ears so she could see me and heard me....

All over again!

Grrr.....the feeling is back and i hate it...the feeling will only bring disaster !!! aaaahhhh!!!..GOD pls help me....guide me.....tell me what should I do....i do not wanna suffer with this feeling anymore.....IT kills :(

Its so freaking fast !!

at 1st i thought of quitting form 6....hmm....yes i did...thought bout it....at 1st i thought form 6 is easy ! but den its not !!! so i decided to quit....but then..before i quit..i seek advice from several people...and they say...do not quit....if you wanna quit...finish up your lower 6 1st...and yea i agree with it...give me time to think wisely :)....hmmm.....in just a blink of an eye...lower 6 is gonna end soon (12th of november)..WTF rite?!?! haiz....

5 freaking months....OMG!!...we have been going crazy together...omg...i guess now i will just continue my form 6 eh....i'm not a QUITTER !!...grr!!....PIA dota for now...then delete it away next year..haha!!

must focus....PUT YOUR HEAD IN THE SCHOOL !!...wheee....i gonna miss alot people in form 6...haha!! all the crazy classmates....hmmm...
now i wonder....
i miss them in just merely 5 months....what if next year after stpm??? 1 year rite?!?! OMG!!...i will just break down and cry !! yes i will....woots!!!  i hope i get into police next year...den no need to cry..hehe!!....GOOD LUCK TO ALL YOU 6 SETIAs !!!

motivasi jati diri..

hmmm...i din regret going this ceramah....although the whole hall only got like 4 chinese???hahah!!...the motivation he gave is awesome...

basically he share most of his story...hmmm....for example....GOD created rules for what???is it to control us ?? it is just the same as government created rules to help us..to protect us....we are sane people...if insane people??here is the example..


a guy bought this MYVI (rm 60K) and he is so proud of it...and then he pass by a hospital and he saw the signboard (do not horn)...and he said "how dare you to stop me...i bought the horn for 10K and u say do not horn ?!?! you are only a signboard and you dare telling me not to horn this 10K horn ?!?!" and he press the horn twice...without knowing anything,few ahmas and ahpeks fall from the bed and dead....and he continue his journey...
he reached a slope...and there is a signboard (pls slow down your speed)...and he said "how dare you signboards?!?! are you trying to fool with me ?!?! I bought 5 gears and you tell me to you use only gear 1 or 2??!?! "  and he ad his speed and go down the slope with 5th gear....GOD bless him that he is not dead...then..
he reached till a trafiic light and it turns red...and he said "how dare you traffic light ?!?! are you trying to fool with me also?!..my job is an engineer and i know how you work..i know what is red yellow and green so you dont try to fool me !! " so he speed and go pass the red light..GOD bless him again that he is alright...


that is what an insane people will do......lets say if a guy..his wife is going to give birth at home...he have to rush back...and he speed pass the traffic lights...is he right?! and if a guy wanted to let go..and he have to reach a Rumah Rehat asap..so he speed !..is he right?!...yes rite? so both of them speed...and they met with an accident...sooo...

rules is to control us and guides us to go on the right path....

my best partner ever :)

its been 3 years....3 years she stayed with us...hmmm...time do flies...3 years old d...awww.....

big d hor...must listen to me d hor..haha!! weird eh..

3 years in our world but in dog's world is 24 years old....haiz...24 years old d wei....older den me =.='//

anyway..HAPPY BIRTHDAY CHESSIE !!!...